Why Does He Do That?

  • by Lundy Bancroft
  • Narrated by Peter Berkrot
  • 13 hrs and 35 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men---and to change your life. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men shows you how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship. You will learn about:


The early warning signs
Ten abusive personality types
The role of drugs and alcohol
What you can fix, and what you can't
How to get out of a relationship safely

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What the Critics Say

"This is essential reading for those in the helping professions and highly recommended for all libraries, especially those in communities with emergency shelter programs." (Library Journal)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

Gives deep understanding of an illusive problem!

Where does Why Does He Do That? rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

The author speaks from experience, years worth, and you can hear the truth ringing in his words. He uncovers the roots of this problem so you can see them clearly. If you've tried to communicate your experience but just can't seem to find compassion or understanding from others then listen to this book. I have taken huge leaps forward in just a week! This book has stopped the churning wheels of my mind in analyzing and trying to understand my spouse. I moved out 3 weeks ago (before reading this) because I was finally able to focus on finding REST. I could not battle in my home any more. I began seeing my husband as a good guy again right away and was tempted to go right back. This book has given me solid perspective that has helped me see through my emotional response. Sadly, control is not love. Don't suffer alone, listen to this book.


What other book might you compare Why Does He Do That? to and why?

I've never found one.


What about Peter Berkrot’s performance did you like?

He has a nice authoritative voice.


What insight do you think you’ll apply from Why Does He Do That??

It helps tremendously to understand what style(s) of "abuser" my husband is. My mind has stopped constantly searching for understanding. I don't have enough experience or frame of reference to draw good conclusions but thankfully Lundy Bancroft does. Also my emotions were distorting my experiences...ex. "surely, it's not that bad", "doesn't everyone experience this?", "maybe I'm not submissive enough" and on and on. This book is less about giving advice and more about sharing years worth of experience and highlighting commonalities among abusive men. Rather than feeling like your thoughts have been manipulated into thinking a certain way (again) you feel like someone has come along with a big flashlight and helped you see so you can find your way back onto a path of having a healthy sense of self and identity and maybe even health, peace and joy!


Any additional comments?

If you have an inkling that there is verbal abuse in your relationship DO listen to this book!

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- Shelly

Better than can be described

Would you listen to Why Does He Do That? again? Why?

Definitely! Very rich in information.


What did you like best about this story?

The practicality of it.


What does Peter Berkrot bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

His voice and intonation took this book to another level.


If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

I Got Your Number.


Any additional comments?

This is the first and only review that I have ever written...it was that good. I'm also a doctoral level psychologist and the book was right on. It will help many. I am recommending it left and right to my abuse clients...

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- Ana

Book Details

  • Release Date: 06-30-2011
  • Publisher: Tantor Audio