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Publisher's Summary

To make up or break up? Whether you’re just getting serious or have a long-term commitment, no other question causes so much heartache and self-doubt. Many other books tell you how to fix your relationship. This groundbreaking best seller is the first one to help you choose whether you should try—or you need to go.
Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems:

What sins are forgivable and which ones unpardonable?
Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself?
What is your sex life really like, and how important is it?
Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable?
Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line—what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship—and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that, whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing.
©1997 Mira Kirshenbaum (P)2010 Brilliance Audio, Inc.
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Critic Reviews

"[T]hreaded through the book, which is written in a sympathetic, chatty, accessible style, are validating anecdotes that dramatize how other people have experienced and responded to the same problems the reader is going through." (Publishers Weekly)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

By Nadia on 06-07-10

Gives you much to think about

The best part of this book is that it gives you concrete questions that help you examine specific aspects of your relationship. The author is honest about there being no specific signs that point to a clear and definitive need to leave or stay. Rather, she gives listeners the percentages of ppl who, given their responses for the questions, were happy leaving (or unhappy staying).

This isn't for those who are looking for someone to give them the answer. But it is for those are willing to put their emotional energy into rethinking their relationships and making practical decisions that will either end them or revive them.

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19 of 19 people found this review helpful

By Danielle on 09-26-11


This book is so amazing, really made me see clear about my relationship. I realised that yes we did have some issues that definitely needed to be addressed but that in the end, my relationship was 'too good to leave' and that it was definitely worth fighting for. We have now been seeing a relationship counsellor and are happier than ever! Thank you :):):)

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13 of 13 people found this review helpful

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

By Scott on 08-13-16

wow simple and true.......

very wise and interesting good points I'm sure looking at myself and my actions now...

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By Melissa on 06-13-16

Great advice when you can't decide

great narrator.. like a pep talk from a wise friend that puts everything in perspective

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