• The Dance of Intimacy

  • A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships
  • By: Harriet Lerner Ph.D.
  • Narrated by: Harriet Lerner
  • Length: 2 hrs and 53 mins
  • Abridged Audiobook
  • Release date: 12-16-99
  • Language: English
  • Publisher: HarperAudio
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars 4.3 (130 ratings)

Regular price: $15.96

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Publisher's Summary

The Dance of Intimacy takes a careful look at relationships where intimacy is most challenged by too much emotional distance, too much intensity, or simply too much pain. In clear, direct, and dramatic terms, Dr. Lerner illustrates how we can move differently in these relationships, be they with a distant or unfaithful spouse, a depressed sister, a difficult mother, an alcoholic father, an uncommitted lover, a dying parent, or an estranged family member. And she teaches us about "the differences that make a difference": the changes we can make in one or two significant relationships that will affect our capacity for intimacy and selfhood for a lifetime. The Dance of Intimacy offers no "quick fix" for the human dilemma that we all confront. Instead, Dr. Lerner offers us the most solid, respectful, and helpful insights on intimate relationships that both men and women may ever encounter. Picking up where the best-selling The Dance of Anger left off, Dr. Lerner redefines the meaning of intimacy for today, and shows how good relationships can be strengthened and difficult ones healed.
©1989 Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. (P)1997, 2004 HarperCollins Publishers, Inc.
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful
3 out of 5 stars
By Ingrid on 05-26-12


What did you like best about The Dance of Intimacy? What did you like least?

This is a condensed version of the book. There were only three chapters. The book has 13 chapters. The chapters missing are important to understanding the nuances of "courageous acts of change" and I am really dissapointed. I am reading this book on recommendation from my thearapist and was excited to have it in audio format, what a shame. I will call the company and see if there was a problem downloading or something but I'm pretty sure it wasn't a tech issue since there was an epilogue.

On the up side, what I was able to listen to was good information. Helpful for women with boundary and distance issues in intimate/family relationships. The book is pre-co-dependent era and I appreciated not hearing that phrase and simply learning some simple changes to improve communication.

Would you be willing to try another book from Harriet Lerner? Why or why not?

If it was the whole book.

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6 of 6 people found this review helpful

2 out of 5 stars
By Craig on 03-18-07

The Dance of Disfunctional Families

A more appropriate title for this book! If you're looking to create more intimacy in your relationship with a significant other, you best look elsewhere. The emphasis here is far greater on coping with family problems than with creating intimacy. Alcoholic relatives, gay "outings", family illnesses, and suicidal relatives are the emphasis here, not intimacy. To be fair, there is a lot of good infomation in this book. It's just not about what you might be looking for if you accept it at the title's face value. Also the narration is uninteresting at best and boring at worst. There are a few choice morsels here if you are willing to pick amongst the sad family stories, the incessent "polically correct" language and the abundent use of "psycology speak" terminology.

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12 of 13 people found this review helpful

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful
3 out of 5 stars
By James on 05-25-16


There are some valid points are raised in this book, but often it feels quite dated.
While i feel readers of both sexes can take something from this book, I feel it assumes a female audience.

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0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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