Talking to Crazy
- How to Deal with the Irrational and Impossible People in Your Life
- Narrated by: L. J. Ganser
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged Audiobook
- Release date: 10-21-15
- Language: English
- Publisher: Audible Studios
Regular price: $19.95
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Let's face it: We all know people who are irrational. No matter how hard you try to reason with them, it never works. So what's the solution? How do you talk to someone who's out of control? What can you do with a boss who bullies, a spouse who yells, or a friend who frequently bursts into tears?
In his book Just Listen, Mark Goulston shared his best-selling formula for getting through to the resistant people in your life. Now, in his breakthrough new book Talking to Crazy, he brings his communication magic to the most difficult group of all - the downright irrational. As a psychiatrist, Goulston has seen his share of crazy, and he knows from experience that you can't simply argue it away. The key to handling irrational people is to learn to lean in to the crazy - to empathize with it. That radically changes the dynamic and transforms you from a threat into an ally.
Talking to Crazy explains this counterintuitive Sanity Cycle and reveals:
Why people act the way they do
How instinctive responses can exacerbate the situation and what to do instead
When to confront a problem and when to walk away
How to use a range of proven techniques including Time Travel, the Fish-bowl, and the Belly Roll
And much more
You can't reason with unreasonable people - but you can reach them. This powerful and practical book shows you how.
Customer ReviewsMost Helpful
By Cecilia on 11-01-15
Ready for my Crazies
I loved the first chapters, some chapters didn't apply to the crazies in my life but it was still worth listening to, because you never know...
I was able to see so many characteristics in the people I know and they were all over the spectrum, the histrionic, the narcisistic, the dependent, the paranoid, the borderline and thank God no sociopathic... I very much enjoyed the labeling, hehehe specially when thinking about the inlaws and Thanksgiving, OMG that nailed it!!!but then the book gets deeper and makes you feel a little more empathic to some, I don't feel like I need to slap some reason into a particular friend, and I'm ready to say a definite goodbye to another.
Very liberating, I would highly recommend it.
42 of 43 people found this review helpful
By Aaron Olson on 11-04-15
The book's optimistic title caught my interest, but alas it doesn't live up to its title. The problem is that the author focuses too much on specific situations rather that fostering an attitude of listening. The main message of the book is to put yourself in the shoes of other people. But rather than helping foster this attitude, he seems to act as if each situation is different. For example, he gives advice such as, "say - (insert specific advice) - then pause and say, really, then say oh tell me more".
Much of the advice is suspicious because the author is seeing his results from a biased sample size - the people that he actually follows up with or give him messages that his advice works. But people don't bother to follow up when things go wrong. So he is getting message back that his system works, but it made me wonder how often is advice goes bad.
Also, one of his main recommendations involves telling others how they feel! In my experience people don't like it when I presume to know how they are feeling. Much better to ask rather than assume. I was surprised how often he recommends this approach. It may work for the author who has years of experience, but I am not going presume to know what someone else is feeling - it is very likely to blow up in my face. We've all heard that assuming makes an a** out of you and me.
If the author's advice actually does work, I would rather have him tell me the underlying beliefs and values he holds and how he comes to his advice, rather than a manual for dealing with specific situations of crazy.
I gave the book 2 stars because it was entertaining enough to listen to on my way to work.
123 of 132 people found this review helpful
Customer ReviewsMost Helpful
By MRS J. on 10-30-15
Sound advice we all need to hear
This book contains some of the most common-sense, interpersonal advice, I've ever heard and is a useful tool for my therapist kit bag
2 of 2 people found this review helpful