Are you happy in your marriage—except for those weekly spats over who empties the dishwasher more often? Not a single complaint—unless you count the fact that you haven’t had sex since the Bush administration? Prepared to be there in sickness and in health—so long as it doesn’t mean compromising? Be honest: Ever lay awake thinking how much more fun married life used to be?
If you’re a member of the human race, then the answer is probably “yes” to all of the above. Marriage is a mysterious, often irrational business. Making it work till death do you part—or just till the end of the week—isn’t always easy. And no one ever handed you a user’s manual.
Until now. With Spousonomics, Paula Szuchman and Jenny Anderson offer something new: a clear-eyed, rational route to demystifying your disagreements and improving your relationship. The key, they propose, is to think like an economist.
That’s right: an economist.
Economics is the study of resource allocation, after all. How do we—as partners in a society, a business, or a marriage—spend our limited time, money, and energy? And how do we allocate these resources most efficiently? Spousonomics answers these questions by taking classic economic concepts and applying them to the domestic front. For example:
Arguing all night isn’t a sign of a communication breakdown; you’re just extremely loss-averse—and by refusing to give an inch, you’re risking even greater losses.
Stay late at the office, or come home for dinner? Be honest about your mother-in-law, or keep your mouth shut and smile? Let the cost-benefit analysis make the call.
Getting your spouse to clean the gutters isn’t a matter of nagging or guilt-tripping; it’s a question of finding the right incentives.
Being “too busy” to exercise or forgetting your anniversary (again): your overtaxed memory and hectic schedule aren’t to blame—moral hazard is.
And when it comes to having more sex: merely a question of supply and demand!
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4 'Spousonomics' Surprises and 1 Critique
- Joshua Kim
So...You know how you hate spending time together?
This book is based on the assumption that men hate listening to their wives and that women hate having (or giving) sex to their husbands- this is a long collection of trades such as (I am not making this up) I, as the man, will listen to you talk for X amount of time but in exchange I want X amount of sex. This extends to things like chores, money and the car. This is not a loving relationship- this is a business relationship. I was disgusted that couples actually see things like affectionate communication, cuddling and sex as chores to be endured and recorded for compensation. There are other lessons in the book but after 3 hours that was the basic formula- I will give you this and you will give me that- and let's not complicate this exchange with love, this is business
If you really think that you need to give your man sex so that he will listen to you about your day at work than save your money and get a book on divorce because that is just sick