So many of us spend so much time enmeshed in other people's problems, trying to solve or change them, that we don't really know where we end and they begin. Not reacting to people or situations that provoke us is not an easy skill to develop. It takes practice and conviction that not reacting, not increasing the drama, doesn't mean we don't care. On the contrary, we are freed to show genuine love and care only when we can detach from the knee-jerk need to fix, solve, rescue, or control. Even the idea that someone else can make us feel happy (or beautiful or angry) or we them is an illusion, says Casey in this remarkable book. All our feelings come from within and we get to choose how to respond to life.
The meditations in this power-packed little book provide us the tools we need to practice letting go of the illusion that we can control anyone or anything beyond our selves. Casey teaches us to focus on finding our own balance point and recognizing how to get to it whenever we find ourselves tempted to rescue or enmesh.
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Live your own life first!
This book is fantastic at painting a picture that provides great relatable examples for the points the author hits on for how to live your own life first in peace and understanding. It provides tools on how to to be centered in the midst of the chaos and drama of others so you can see things as they are and not as they are perceived by you or the other person.
Each moment a principle would start to sink in I felt a release of frustration and/or angst for certain situations and people.
The narrator is very personable and has a pleasant nurturing voice.
The book helps you to let go of the need to save others from themselves so they can grow as they need to which allows you to have peace, healthier boundaries and relationships. It helped me to understand that the manipulative behavior from others stems from their fear and that it's ok to let others learn the hard way. You can be detached from the issue while still being engaged in the situation at hand and be effective at moving through it in a rational way.
I recommend this book for anyone who has ever felt drained from relationships and in cyclical relationships where others are just never happy no matter what you do for them. This is very liberating and freeing if you can successfully adopt and implement the principles of this book. Listen to it as many times as it takes to sink in and keep your joy permanently.
i have zero problems now in relation to people
hearing the principle "there is your business, then there is non of your business". so simple, but it actually flipped my life around at work and at home. I'm focusing on my life now rather than trying to juggle work relationships and people i deal with at home. i went from being depressed and anxiety ridden to being open and ready to move on with my life.
the narrator sounds like she has no soul lol.
just one, be detached. let go of trying to change everything and let god handle all the hardwork. its hard living life now without trying to control everything, but in reality non of us ever had control of anything. I've accepted life and have found some peace.
becoming detached pisses other people off, mainly because they won't be able to control you or effect you anymore. be ready for that. right now as i'm learning to be detached, i'm also learning how to be emotional too. there is a learning curve to being detached and you should get that in your head. you won't hear this audio course and have instant change, you have to apply it all day every day, i've been detached for about 3 weeks now and moving away from old habits is hard at times.
- Dr. Mancilla Psy.D