Regular price: $36.40

Membership details Membership details
  • A 30-day trial plus your first audiobook, free.
  • 1 credit/month after trial – good for any book, any price.
  • Easy exchanges – swap any book you don’t love.
  • Keep your audiobooks, even if you cancel.
  • After your trial, Audible is just $14.95/month.
Select or Add a new payment method

Buy Now with 1 Credit

By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Buy Now for $36.40

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Publisher's Summary

Like countless other parents, doctors Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté have had to confront their children becoming secretive and unreachable. Focused more and more on their friends, they recoiled or grew hostile around adults. Why? The problem, Neufeld suggest, lies in attachment; children are increasingly forming stronger attachments to their friends than to the adults in their lives.
Dr. Neufeld has dubbed this phenomenon peer orientation, which refers to the tendency of children and youth to look to their peers for direction: for a sense of right and wrong, for values, identity and codes of behaviour. This peer orientation undermines family cohesion, poisons the school atmosphere, and fosters an aggressively hostile and sexualized youth culture. It provides a powerful explanation for schoolyard bullying and youth violence; its effects are painfully evident in the context of teenage gangs and criminal activity, in tragedies such as in Littleton, Colorado; Tabor, Alberta; and Victoria, B.C. It is an escalating trend that has never been adequately described or contested until Hold On to Your Kids. Once understood, it becomes self-evident - as do the solutions, none of which are impossible or even costly to undertake.
Hold On To Your Kids will restore parenting to ts natural intuitive basis and the parent-child relationship to its rightful preeminence. The concepts, principles and practical advice contained in Hold On to Your Kids will empower parents to parent and satisfy their children’s inborn need to find direction by turning towards them for their source of authority, contact, and warmth. Daniel Maté’s warm and sensitive narration, gift with dialogue, and engagement with the authors writing make this an enjoyable and informative listen.
©2005 Gordon Neufeld & Gabor Maté (P)2012 Post Hypnotic Press, Inc.
Show More Show Less

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful
5 out of 5 stars
By Julia on 05-08-12

Life changing, hopeful and real

What did you love best about Hold On to Your Kids?

I loved the empathy and connection and validation of what parents feel when their children become alienated. It hit home and healed deep, old hurts.

What other book might you compare Hold On to Your Kids to and why?

A Framework for Understanding Poverty by Ruby K. Payne. Both books work on the concept of rubric -- how any event will be resonded to is based on what the event means. Both books offer life-changing alternate points of veiw.

What about Daniel Maté’s performance did you like?

Daniel Mate is in fact one of the children of one of the authors. His reading affirms the concept of the book.

What did you learn from Hold On to Your Kids that you would use in your daily life?

Very few books have the ability to change how you remember the past and make sense of events that at the time seemed random and against reason. This is one of those books that changes your daily life by allowing you to leave behind the emotional baggage.

Read More Hide me

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

5 out of 5 stars
By Mariah Norton on 07-29-15

A must read for all parents.

This book is an absolute must read for all parents of young and adolescent aged children. I have completed this book twice now and it is a total game changer. Through this book I am learning I must be willing to challenge my perspective on parenting before I can change my child's behavior. This book has greatly improved my relationship with my two young children. I am forever grateful.

Read More Hide me

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

See all Reviews
© Copyright 1997 - 2018 Audible, Inc