Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck

  • by Amy Alkon
  • Narrated by Carrington MacDuffie
  • 7 hrs and 54 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

We live in a world that's very different from the one in which Emily Post came of age. Many of us who are nice (but who also sometimes say "f*ck") are frequently at a loss for guidelines about how to be a good person who deals effectively with the onslaught of rudeness we all encounter. To lead us through this this miasma of modern manners, syndicated columnist Amy Alkon - The Advice Goddess - gives us a new set of manners for our 21st-century lives. In chapters titled "The Telephone", "The Internet", "The Apology", and "Communicating", among others, Alkon maps out new rules that go beyond what fork to use to answer real questions we all have:


When is it okay to phone somebody instead of emailing or texting? When is it rude?
Why shouldn't you tweet about a guest at a private dinner party? Everybody knows privacy is dead, right?
How do you shut the guy up in the pharmacy line with his cellphone on speaker?
When is it right to approach somebody who's crying in public and when is it right to leave him alone?
When should you unfriend somebody on Facebook and what do you say when she calls you on it?
If you have an STD, when do you tell people, what do you say, and do you have to contact everyone you've ever had sex with?
Real advice for today with more than a touch of humor, Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck is destined to give good old Emily a shove off the etiquette shelf (if that's not too rude to say).

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

Hilarious and a Direct Hit - Must Listen

Okay, I didn't know what to expect. Within 20 minutes I was hooked. I was listening while BBQ'ing outside.When I came in my wife said, "you look crazy out there laughing to yourself while your flipping our burgers. Good thing I know you." It's not that this book is so side splitting, it's that Alkon can turn a phase and pick a perfect analogy. MacDuffie does a fabulous job on the narration.

If you want to know how to handle you pesky neighbors, get those people at work to stop asking when you are getting engaged, or just how to say 'no,' then this book is for you. This is definitely for a person who does not mind strong language and suggestive analogies -- so if these things bother you, you should avoid this book. That said, Alkon goes on to be funny without being vulgar -- a neat trick. She also backs up her advice with reference to the latest psychology ; but, that part of the book is very scant so don''t get too nervous.

I recommend that you listen to this -- it is well worth you time. I bought a print copy for my daughter to read -- she is going to love it.
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- GH

The good couldn't outweigh the bad

I know there are people who get outraged at a review for a book that was abandoned but I really do want to comment on this book. There were some really goods points.
First, the narrator, Carrington MacDuffie, was great. I've never listened to her before. Her voice reminds me of a famous Canadian singer, Anne Murray, who has an awesome speaking voice, so that was a bonus.
A point the author made several times, that I can get behind, is that the Internet is not a fearsome dangerous place to be avoided. It can be a fabulous tool for communication and connection, you just have to use some sense when using it. Give some thought to your boundaries and behave accordingly. Great advice. Some of her advice about cell phone use and cell phone 'culture' was interesting and thought provoking. I can't agree with her supposition though that actually phoning someone instead of texting or emailing is rude and intrusive.

Lastly, some of the humour was delightful and I had a few chuckles.


Unfortunately, I decided to DNF the book after about 3 hours for a variety of reasons. First and foremost, the author was incredibly inconsistent. On one hand, she says several times 'if you don't know what to do, behave with kindness and an attitude of inclusiveness'. Then in several parts of the books she describes handling things in a way that are anything but kind...web shaming, stalking wrongdoers, and telling an awful lot of 'white lies'. She also is a proponent of blowing someone off in a written note because that is a lot 'kinder' than talking to the them face to face. Maybe its because this advice goes against everything I've worked so hard to learn about communication and relationships. If you don't have the skills to have a difficult conversation face to face with someone, learn them, don't resort to notes.

There were a lot of other things that rubbed me the wrong way so I let it go.

I sound pretty negative about the author but in reality, she is probably a decent person who I would like in real life. It is clear that she tries to be a kind, civil person, but the behaviour she advocates just gets in the way.
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- Kyahgirl

Book Details

  • Release Date: 06-03-2014
  • Publisher: Brilliance Audio