Christine Ducommun was a happily married wife and mother of two when, after returning to live in the house of her childhood, she began to experience panic attacks and night terrors. Says the author, "I sought therapy, and there I discovered, to my shock and horror, that I had been sexually abused at the hands of my father at a very early age. I surely didn't want to believe it. But as my mind began to release bizarre flashbacks, my alters began to show themselves. Suddenly I lived a life even I couldn't understand: I was a devoted mother, wife, and church leader but also a convicted thief, a promiscuous alcoholic, and a prescription drug addict. Things got much worse before they got better."
Christin was eventually diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder (DID), and her story details an extraordinary 12-year ordeal of coming to grips with the reemergence of competing personalities her mind had created to help her endure her early years. Therapy helps to reveal the personalities, but Christine has much work to do to grasp their individual strengths and weaknesses and understand how each helped her cope and survive her childhood as well as the latent influences they've had in her adult life. Fully reawakened and present, the personalities struggle for control of Christine's mind, and her life tailspins into unimaginable chaos, leaving her to believe she may very well be losing the battle for her sanity. Christine's only hope to regain her stability is to integrate each one's emotional maturity while jettisoning the rest, until at last their chatter in her head could cease. This task, taken on by her gutsy therapist, proves to be the major struggle of her adult life. It takes her on a journey that few with her disorder have the courage or fortitude to travel. A candid look at the effects of sexual abuse, this elegant book shines a bright light on the fragility of the mind and the durability of the spirit. A story of courage, healing, identity, and hope.
©2013 Christine Ducommun (P)2016 Bettie Youngs / Bettie Youngs Book Publishers