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In a style reminiscent of Ayn Rand and H. G. Wells, the stage is set for the Biblical End of Times in this Near Future Sci-fi short story.
Personally, I thought the plot line just plausible enough to produce some delightful rumination. My mind will be stewing semi-conscientiously on this and other possible theories of TEOT for days.
It has been a fun morning 'read.'
I suspect the amount of detail is intentional. Setting the stage perhaps for future expansion of the story? Hm?
The only improvement I could suggest would be to relax the narration just a bit. Make it a little more conversational (i.e. more flex in tone and timbre, less perfect diction and cadence) to better engage a listener's full attention, to more fully paint the mental picture of the encapsulated story.
Other than that, I loved it.