The Dark Lord's Handbook

  • by Paul Dale
  • Narrated by Gildart Jackson
  • 13 hrs and 34 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

To become a Dark Lord is no easy thing. The simple ambition to hold dominion over the world and bend all to your will sounds straightforward, but it's not. There are armies to raise, fortresses to build, heroes to defeat, and battles to be fought. After many spectacular failures, Evil decided to lend more than inspiration to these would-be tyrants. He wrote an easy-to-follow Dark Lord's Handbook. And yet the next Dark Lord that came along screwed up like all the others. It had been hundreds of years, and the Handbook was lost in the annals of time, along with all that was mythic and exciting in the world. Then one day, a randy dragon had a chance encounter. Nine months later a Dark Lord was born. In time, the Handbook found its way to this new contender: Morden.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

"Beware the monologue!"


Every hero has a beginning, but what about the villians? If it weren't for villains there would be no heroes, and that's where this story begins. Dale was able to craft a humorous novel about becoming a Dark Lord that made sense. The handbook spoke to the Dark Lord in-training of getting caught up in monologue while a hero is present, or putting all your power and energy into a single magical item just to lose it (as if it personally knew Sauron itself).

Most of the advice given by the handbook are phrases you may already be familiar with, but with a twist.
Ex: "Absolute power corrupts absolutely, but isn't that the point?"

This novel is certainly not for everyone, but if you play Dungeons & Dragons and looking for a guide to creating your next star villain then this is not a bad choice.
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- Sean

Started out good but turned into a drag

Would you try another book from Paul Dale and/or Gildart Jackson?

No, this felt like a cringe worthy attempt at a disc world novel.


What could Paul Dale have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

Learn to actually develop characters instead of just talking about how they are suppose to be, and possible add some women who are annoying as hell and actually have more than 1 dimension of being evil/contrary/hot. Also... maybe come up with a more original name for the dragon than the one right out of World of Warcraft? Come on! He even mentions the Black Dragonflight WTF?


What didn’t you like about Gildart Jackson’s performance?

Spoke way too slowly and the voice acting as lady deathwing was unbearable, also the accents changed randomly so you can't tell who he is suppose to be.


If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from The Dark Lord's Handbook?

The entire middle section about a pointless voyage and a ridiculous war.


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- Kulain

Book Details

  • Release Date: 11-04-2014
  • Publisher: Tantor Audio