Take the All-Mart!

  • by J. I. Greco
  • Narrated by Michael A. Smith
  • 5 hrs and 22 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

A devastated post-apocalyptic wasteland...a gang of hover-board-riding, cannibalistic bounty hunters...a zombie-filled, world-devouring, sentient department store...and two idiot cyborgs in a 200-year-old mind-controlled Dodge Swinger running from a jilted warlord queen and willing to take it all on for the love of an orgy-loving cyber-nun...and for a reward.... Okay, mostly for the reward.


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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

unique and funny

I don’t exactly know what I was seeking when I grabbed this title for review: unique and funny is always a start, many reviewers say it is diabolically clever. And perhaps in the written form, it truly is. The story was unique and clever, although laden with specific weaponry and other technical references that were not familiar, but presented in such a way as to feel important to the story and fit the action. Unlike other zombie stories I have read, the author is most certainly a fan of various pop-culture hits, as moments in this story approach other more well-known films and stories, from Red Dwarf to Sean of the Dead, with touches of Hitchhiker’s Guide and a bit of Dumb and Dumber humor, the story proceeds quickly, taking full responsibility for the tongue-in-cheek moments and juvenile humor.

Trip and Rudy are sexist, not so intelligent, and wholly out for the adventure: as long as there is a reward. While never quite cute and fuzzy likable, they also do not make apologies for who they are, or how they see the world. And their interplay and the adventures are really just a fun romp – not meant to be more, and it is perfectly enjoyable: I was curious about just what mishap would or could occur, and the inclusion of the sidekick characters often added much to the story’s enjoyment, if not always filling a solid purpose for the plot. However, I would read, rather than listen, to this and any further installments in the series.

For me, the narration provided by Michael A. Smith was uneven and often uninspired. A decent voice with nice timbre, although a few hesitations that were not edited out, and a rather flat affect in the majority of the narration. It sounded exactly as what it is: someone ‘reading’ a book. The lack of emotional affect varied: some character voices and active moments were better than others. And, when citing an obviously bad and fake accent, it would be beneficial to actually ‘attempt’ the accent, not just change tone.

Audiobook provided for review by the narrator.

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- AudioBook Reviewer "All of my reviews are on my blog audiobookreviewer dot com"

Sexy, Funny, Stupid, Violent, and Kinda Wonderful

If William Gibson, Kevin Smith, and Quentin Tarantino had sex in the back of Jack Kerouac's car - this book would be the baby.

Mind-controlled cars. Drugged up anti-heroes with lots of hilarious wise-cracking. An all-devouring MegaStore that turns it's customer's into zombies. And lots of beer and lust and other stuff.

Until we get a movie version, this audiobook is a great substitute.

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- Austin C. Beeman

Book Details

  • Release Date: 11-29-2012
  • Publisher: James Greco