• If You Didn't Bring Jerky, What Did I Just Eat?

  • Misadventures in Hunting, Fishing, and the Wilds of Suburbia
  • By: Bill Heavey
  • Narrated by: Ian Patrick Williams
  • Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (411 ratings)

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If You Didn't Bring Jerky, What Did I Just Eat?  By  cover art

If You Didn't Bring Jerky, What Did I Just Eat?

By: Bill Heavey
Narrated by: Ian Patrick Williams
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Publisher's summary

Whether he is accidentally cooking his brain with hand warmers or yanking his lure away from a trophy fish just before it takes the bait, Bill Heavey can do no right. For almost a decade, he has chronicled his incompetence on the back page of Field & Stream, where his hilarious dispatches about life as a hapless outdoorsman who lives in suburbia have earned him legions of fans.

But Heavey is more than a humorist. The stories in this book range from amusing tales of a modern dad struggling to navigate the finer points of parenting and married life to longer and more serious narratives that involve travel, adventure, and tragedy. No matter what he's writing about, Heavey is a master of blending humor and pathos - and wide-ranging outdoor enthusiasms - into a poignant and potent stew.

©2007 Bill Heavey. Foreword copyright 2007 by David E. Petzal. Originally published by arrangement with Field & Stream magazine,in which the book’s pieces originally appeared. Recorded by arrangement with Grove Atlantic, Inc. (P)2014 Audible Inc.

What listeners say about If You Didn't Bring Jerky, What Did I Just Eat?

Average customer ratings
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Beware the twist

the only reason I didnt finish the book in one sitting is that the author has this tendency to go from belly laughs, and pensive passages, to topics that hit home a little bit harder. I am facing my father's slow death, and I found that this book drew out emotions that I have been avoiding.

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3 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Funny because you can relate!

If you have ever hunted or fished in your life, you can relate to his stories. He is funny because he always pokes fun at himself.

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3 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

A great story ruined by AWFUL mouth sounds

This book has wonderfully amusing and heart touching stories of hunting, but the worst mouth/tongue popping/smacking I've ever have ever forced myself to listen to. the reader if very engaging, but editing & sounds dropped the ball TERRIBLY!!!!
VERY DISAPPOINTED, but only with the performance!!!!

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1 person found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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The legendary Bill Heavey

I had heard Bill Heavey mentioned on meat eater podcast so when I came across the audiobook I jumped at it. It was a million times better than I thought it would be. Funny, heartfelt and reminds you why we hunt. Can’t wait to listen to more. Makes my work days fly by.

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interesting, humorous

I'm not a hunter and havent fished since i was a teen, but surprisingly there's something about these stories that has captivated me, with an occasional chuckle or belly laugh. Give this author a try!

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  • Bo
  • 09-12-17

Hilarious

This book had me laughin'
This is something every outdoorsman can relate to. we've all been in these funny situations

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Laugh out loud until you cry

A forever keeper. Top shelf all the way. A true classic with tales every hunter can appreciate.

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Emotional rollercoaster

I laughed and cried this man is pretty relatable. Also this narrator has a amazing voice.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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good listen

if you're looking for a good laugh and maybe a tear jurker as well this is a good one to grab.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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W. Larson

This is the funniest book I have read in a long time. Made a fool of my self driving and laughing with no one else in the car. Not the cornball humor you read on the back page of most outdoor magazines. Great wit and sarcasm. I think most sportsman can relate to some of the stories. I can. Candid stories about loss and family will stay with me for awhile. Great read and perfectly narrated. Top 5 book for me.

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