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You Don't Have to Say You Love Me
- A Memoir
- Narrated by: Sherman Alexie
- Length: 12 hrs and 9 mins
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Publisher's summary
One of the most anticipated books of 2017 - Entertainment Weekly and Bustle
A searing, deeply moving memoir about family, love, and loss from a critically acclaimed, best-selling National Book Award winner.
When his mother passed away at the age of 78, Sherman Alexie responded the only way he knew how: He wrote. The result is this stunning memoir. Featuring 78 poems and 78 essays, Alexie shares raw, angry, funny, profane, tender memories of a childhood few can imagine - growing up dirt poor on an Indian reservation, one of four children raised by alcoholic parents. Throughout, a portrait emerges of his mother as a beautiful, mercurial, abusive, intelligent, complicated woman. You Don't Have to Say You Love Me is a powerful account of a complicated relationship, an unflinching and unforgettable remembrance.
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When high-school teacher Caelum Quirk and his wife, Maureen, move to Littleton, Colorado, they both get jobs at Columbine High School. In April 1999, while Caelum is away, Maureen finds herself in the library at Columbine, cowering in a cabinet and expecting to be killed. Miraculously, she survives. But when Caelum and Maureen flee to an illusion of safety on the Quirk family's Connecticut farm, they discover that the effects of chaos are not easily put right.
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excellent all around yarn
- By G. on 01-10-09
By: Wally Lamb
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Between Two Worlds
- Growing Up in the Shadow of Saddam
- By: Zainab Salbi, Laurie Becklund
- Narrated by: Josephine Bailey
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Zainab Salbi was 11-years-old when her father was chosen to serve as Saddam Hussein's personal pilot, her family often forced to spend weekends with Saddam where he watched their every move. As a palace insider, Zainab offers a singular glimpse of what it is like to come of age under a dictator and provides an intimate portrait of the man she was taught to call "uncle". She watched as Saddam pitted friends, spouses, and even children against each other to compete for his approval.
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An excellent history lesson
- By Ella on 12-01-09
By: Zainab Salbi, and others
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Learning to Die in Miami
- Confessions of a Refugee Boy
- By: Carlos Eire
- Narrated by: Robert Fass
- Length: 11 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Carlos Eire's story of a boyhood uprooted by the Cuban Revolution quickly lures us in, as eleven-year-old Carlos and his older brother Tony touch down in the sun-dappled Miami of 1962 - a place of daunting abundance where his old Cuban self must die to make way for a new, American self waiting to be born. In this enchanting new work, narrated in Eire's inimitable and lyrical voice, young Carlos adjusts to life in his new country.
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Excellent memoir of a forgotten time in history
- By BRB on 03-23-15
By: Carlos Eire
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Because I Come from a Crazy Family
- The Making of a Psychiatrist
- By: Edward M. Hallowell
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 13 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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When Edward M. Hallowell was 11, a voice out of nowhere told him he should become a psychiatrist. A mental health professional of the time would have called this psychosis. But young Edward (Ned) took it in stride, despite not quite knowing what "psychiatrist" meant. With a psychotic father, an alcoholic mother, an abusive stepfather, and two so-called learning disabilities of his own, Ned was accustomed to unpredictable behaviour from those around him and to a mind he felt he couldn't always control.
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Love and connection permeates through this book!
- By Steve Steinmetz on 06-29-18
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Native Country of the Heart
- A Memoir
- By: Cherríe Moraga
- Narrated by: Cherríe Moraga
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Native Country of the Heart is the writer and activist Cherrie Moraga's love letter to her "unlettered" mother. It begins with her mother, Elvira Isabel Moraga, who as a child, along with her siblings, was hired out by her own father to pick cotton in California's Imperial Valley. The lives of Cherrie and her mother, and of their people, are woven together in a story of critical reflection and deep personal revelation as Moraga charts her own coming to consciousness alongside the heartbreaking story of her mother's decline.
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a must read for all chicanx
- By Rachel Barnett on 04-28-19
By: Cherríe Moraga
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Any Man
- A Novel
- By: Amber Tamblyn
- Narrated by: Glenn Davis, Robin Miles, Therese Plummer, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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In this electric and provocative debut novel, Amber Tamblyn blends genres of poetry, prose, and elements of suspense to give shape to the shocking narratives of victims of sexual violence, mapping the destructive ways in which our society perpetuates rape culture, brilliantly brought to life through a multi-voice performance featuring Glenn Davis, Ben Foster, Marc Maron, Jason Ritter, John Roberts, Russ Tamblyn, Amber Tamblyn, January Lavoy, Phoebe Strole, Robin Miles, Thérèse Plummer, Dan Bittner, James Fouhey, and Michael Crouch.
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I've been finished with this for hours
- By Bill on 06-29-18
By: Amber Tamblyn
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The Mathematician's Shiva
- By: Stuart Rojstaczer
- Narrated by: Angela Brazil, Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 10 hrs and 38 mins
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When the greatest female mathematician in history passes away, her son, Alexander "Sasha" Karnokovitch, just wants to mourn his mother in peace. But rumor has it the notoriously eccentric Polish émigré has solved one of the most difficult problems in all of mathematics and has spitefully taken the solution to her grave. A ragtag group of mathematicians from around the world descends upon Rachela's shiva, determined to find the proof or solve it for themselves - even if it means prying up the floorboards for notes.
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Great read
- By Lee Crowe on 07-27-15
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Rare Bird
- A Memoir of Loss and Love
- By: Anna Whiston-Donaldson
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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On an ordinary September day, 12-year-old Jack is swept away in a freak neighborhood flood. His parents and younger sister are left to wrestle with the awful questions: How could God let this happen? Can we ever be happy again? They each fall into the abyss of grief in different ways. And in the days and months to come, they each find their faltering way toward peace. In Rare Bird, Anna Whiston-Donaldson unfolds a mother's story of loss that leads, in time, to enduring hope.
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Warning! Tears
- By Madge on 08-16-15
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Walking to Listen
- 4,000 Miles Across America, One Story at a Time
- By: Andrew Forsthoefel
- Narrated by: Andrew Forsthoefel
- Length: 13 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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At 23, Andrew Forsthoefel headed out the back door of his home in Chadds Ford, Pennsylvania, with a backpack, an audio recorder, his copies of Whitman and Rilke, and a sign that read "Walking to Listen". He had just graduated from Middlebury College and was ready to begin his adult life, but he didn't know how. So he decided to take a cross-country quest for guidance, one where everyone he met would be his guide. In the year that followed, he faced an Appalachian winter and a Mojave summer. He met beasts inside: fear, loneliness, doubt.
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Transcends the typical trekking story
- By barefoot rabbit on 08-07-18
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The Boy Kings of Texas
- A Memoir
- By: Domingo Martinez
- Narrated by: Emilio Delgado
- Length: 13 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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A lyrical and authentic book that recounts the story of a border-town family in Brownsville, Texas in the 1980s, as each member of the family desperately tries to assimilate and escape life on the border to become "real" Americans, even at the expense of their shared family history. This is really un-mined territory in the memoir genre that gives in-depth insight into a previously unexplored corner of America.
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It was Okay
- By DebKoo on 05-17-13
By: Domingo Martinez
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Forgiveness
- By: Chiquis Rivera
- Narrated by: Arika Rapson
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Chiquis Rivera is a singer and the daughter of the late music superstar Jenni Rivera. In Forgiveness, her memoir, Chiquis bravely reveals the abuse she suffered at the hands of her father during her childhood and the difficulties she's faced in her personal life as a result. Despite growing up marked by the wounds of abuse, she eventually conquered her fear of love and intimacy.
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Audio
- By Eli on 03-24-17
By: Chiquis Rivera
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After four women disappear from the Taos Pueblo reservation, Deputy Eva “Lightning Dance” Duran dives into the case. For her, it’s personal. Among the missing is her best friend, Paloma, a heroin addict who left behind an eighteen-year-old son. Eva senses a lack of interest from the department as she embarks on the investigation. But their reluctance only fuels her fire. Eva teams up with tribal police officer and longtime friend Cruz “Wolf Song” Romero to tackle a mystery that could both ruin her reputation and threaten her standing in the tribe.
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scenery and people well described
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The Beginning and End of Rape
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Despite what major media sources say, violence against Native women is not an epidemic. An epidemic is biological and blameless. Violence against Native women is historical and political, bounded by oppression and colonial violence. This book, like all of Sarah Deer's work, is aimed at engaging the problem head-on - and ending it. The Beginning and End of Rape collects and expands the powerful writings in which Deer has advocated for cultural and legal reforms to protect Native women from endemic sexual violence and abuse.
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What listeners say about You Don't Have to Say You Love Me
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- MC
- 08-01-17
A Painful Gift
You don't hear people talk much about their complicated and painful relationships with their mothers, but you especially don't hear it much in Native circles. Mr. Alexie, you've given visibility and a social permission to feel the pain and isolation of being the son or daughter of a complicated mother. Thank you for sharing your gifts, stories, and pain. This was beautiful, hilarious, heartbreaking, and resilient. Anyone who has a mother can learn from and love this book.
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40 people found this helpful
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- Tom
- 07-20-17
True connection
This was the best book I have ever listened to. The author's stories about his life and his growth over time helped me to better understand myself. He shared himself. He shared life on the Rez. He did it with real emotion.
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32 people found this helpful
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- Lee Webster
- 06-18-17
Riveting
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Absolutely! It made me revisit my own difficulties with my hyper-religious mother with whom I never had a close relationship while she lived.
Who was your favorite character and why?
Lillian was certainly a favorite character because living on the Navajo reservation for 8 months one year I saw how phenomenal the women were and how they held up their families and culture.
Have you listened to any of Sherman Alexie’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
No, his inflection when he spoke "Indian" was wonderful to hear.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
Lillian, a real Super Woman.
Any additional comments?
Mr. Alexie, Thank you for this book. It's stirred up a host of issues for me. It was difficult to hear because of my own guilt about how I often showed my own mother such little respect for her choices. I'm slowly understanding why she did what she did now that she's long gone.
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20 people found this helpful
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- Chercheuse
- 07-26-17
Unremitting Negativity
I listened to the first three of the twelve total hours and had to stop. Those hours included a description of animal torture, an extensive scatological section that was completely gratuitous, and comparing how the Native American children were treated at school to the tortures at Guantanomo (sp?) Bay with a description of the tortures at Guantanomo Bay.
It was interesting and long overdue that a Native American's voice is heard on a large scale - to learn that on the reservations some traditional culture survives. Alexie's point of the extreme violence and degradation of the contemporary culture is clearly made. It is horrific and unjust. The book is also well written and has poetic moments but I could not take the detailed relentless negativity. Perhaps as the book progresses it gets better. I just could not bear to find out. Also Alexie reads it well - sometimes as a poet would read his work and the sing song lilt of the Native American speech is charming to hear.
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19 people found this helpful
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- Georgia
- 06-25-17
A Voice for this Time
In this polarized time, Sherman Alexie has expressed the experience of feeling judged and the pain of racism brilliantly without rancor and still hitting the mark with every thought. He expresses grief at so many levels. His grief is a metaphor for my grief for our country! This is a powerful must read for everyone - I wish it could be a high school requirement but, as pointed out by the author/narrator, his work is considered inappropriate. In fact, it is what our country needs right now, regardless of your political view. Tender, sensitive and raw.
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18 people found this helpful
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- Garry Brown
- 07-02-17
Sherman Alexie dances with words.
If you could sum up You Don't Have to Say You Love Me in three words, what would they be?
Honor our elders.
What was one of the most memorable moments of You Don't Have to Say You Love Me?
The impact of the metaphor of Mr. Alexie nakedly owning the acne scars of his back and revealing them openly to his wife and embracing them brought home the power of healing relationships and acceptance.
What about Sherman Alexie’s performance did you like?
Mr. Alexie's repetition of his stories and phrases within the stories created both the image of repetative patterns as in his mother's quilts and musical refrains.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
The story of Mr. Alexie's conscious decision not to be present at his mother's death flooded me with memories of my own mother's death a little more than two months after undergoing surgery to repair an abdominal aortic aneurysm and suffering almost every possible post operative medical complication. I, too, was not present at my mother's death. To quote Jennifer James, a Seattle talk show psychologist, "I did the best I could with what I had at the time." as did Mr. Alexie. Unlike Mr. Alexie, I persued medicine as a career so his stories of his own medical condition and the conditions of his family resonate. Mr. Alexie shares both his triumphs and his pain with grace and dignity.
Any additional comments?
"Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be obtained." ~Marie Curie Lillian Alexie was right. Her son's gift is story telling, in English, and he has found his voice.
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17 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-05-17
Best memoir ever! Wish I could give it 8 stars!
Sherman Alexie is funny, real, emotional, honest, and beautiful. I frequently am disappointed with writers as readers. Not this one! I love his native-American cadence. When his voice breaks as he speaks of intense events with his mother, I cried. I loved this book so much that as soon as I finished it, I missed him so much that I immediately listened to it again.
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13 people found this helpful
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- Lynn Labe
- 10-26-17
Grief-Stricken Ramblings
I loved Part Time Indian, and thought this memoir would be just my thing. Alexie is a wonderful writer, but this book was hard to take. It wasn’t as much about his relationship with his mom as about his grief after her death. These are expressed as free associative mini- essays, poems, and random thoughts. The book needed a good editor for it to be palatable. One third the way through, I was getting more and more annoyed with his rants and continual mention of being “rich and famous.” He may a recognized excellent writer, but he shouldn’t get a pass on writing a decent memoir.
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12 people found this helpful
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- Helen T. Ricotta
- 08-28-17
Could have done with about half as much!
I really enjoyed the first four hours...the author' s reading was absolutely magical. Around hour six I was starting to panic when I realized I wasn't even half-way through! I enjoyed the storytelling, his past, his present and the emotional turmoil around his relationship with his mother and her death. I was not quite as interested in his poetry but his reading did help me hear it with a new perspective. But when he says that grief is repetitive....I believe his grief! I stayed the course and finished it because I do enjoy some of his other writing and I appreciate how hard such honesty can be. But I can't tell you how glad I was to be finished!
3.5 stars
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- sjdmfa
- 06-17-17
The poetry of Grief
Alexie's history as a poet shines in this book. It echoes and repeats much as grief does. I found myself rationing my listening time because I never wanted it to end.
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10 people found this helpful