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Neil Strauss became famous to millions around the world as the author of The Game, a funny and slyly instructive account of how he transformed himself from a scrawny, insecure nerd into the ultraconfident, ultrasuccessful "pickup artist" known as Style. The book jump-started the international "seduction community" and made Strauss a household name - revered or notorious - among single men and women alike.
But the experience of writing The Game also transformed Strauss into a man who could have what every man wants: the ability to date - and/or have casual sex with - almost every woman he met. The results were heady, to be sure. But they also conditioned him to view the world as a kind of constant parade of women, sex, and opportunity - with intimacy and long-term commitment taking a backseat.
That is until he met the woman who forced him to choose between herself and the parade. The choice was not only difficult, it was wrenching. It forced him deep into his past, to confront not only the moral dimensions of his pickup lifestyle but also a wrenching mystery in his childhood that shaped the man he became. It sent him into extremes of behavior that exposed just how conflicted his life had become. And it made him question everything he knew about himself,and about the way men and women live with and without each other.
He would never be the same again.
Searingly honest, compulsively listenable, this new book may have the same effect on you.
Customer ReviewsMost Helpful
By Evan on 11-07-15
I have never read a more real, honest and vulnerable book on relationships than this one. It takes a lot of guts to put this out on the authors part as well as the people in his life.
It's one of the most unique love stories I've come across. I was engaged the whole time.
8 of 8 people found this review helpful
By Ville on 01-21-16
Interesting but not the whole truth
In the beginning of the book the author sets a very common problem: when you're single you want to be in a relationship but when you're in a relationship, you want back your freedom. I impatiently wanted to find out if the author has found a new, refreshing perspective to resolve this issue. Unfortunately he has not. His bottom line is that you need to give up short term pleasures for long term results.
But the book is more than that. It's not the ultimate truth about relationships, but it is a very interesting story about the author's own relationship to himself, to his parents, to his past, to his lovers and to his to-be wife. The book is mainly for people who are interested in the author himself, but those who have never questioned their parents or resolved the issues surrounding their childhood might get a very encouraging slap in the face reading this book also.
Unfortunately, as the author tells you not to idealize your parents, he is unable to break the pattern of idealizing his wife, turning this book into a sort of a love letter to her towards the end. Or to be more cynical, into an apology of why he has to give up his old ways and do whatever it takes to make their relationship last.
After having gone through his tales of therapeutic interventions and polyamoric experiments, as you expect to hear the great wisdom he gained through it all, you are left hanging. The book has a manufactured "they lived happily ever after" ending filled with cliches about how to make relationships last. Since, by the time this book was published, they have only been married for less than two years, you are left to wait for the next book to tell you in 5 or 10 years whether it really worked for them and what the final lessons actually were.
If you want the author's perspective for the purposes of self-improvement and relationship building, I'd advice you to skip this lengthy book and its somewhat novice take on these issues and instead check out the works of John Bradshaw.
12 of 13 people found this review helpful