Not Lost Forever: My Story of Survival

  • by Carmina Salcido, Steve Jackson
  • Narrated by Xe Sands
  • 7 hrs and 58 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

Twenty years ago, one man's murderous rampage destroyed his own family . . . and devastated a community. Now the only survivor - his daughter - tells her story at last.
On April 14, 1989, for reasons still debated today, Mexican immigrant RamÓn Salcido went on a violent rampage in the idyllic Sonoma Valley wine country where he lived and worked. In the course of just two hours, he killed his wife, Angela, her two younger sisters, his mother-in-law, and the man with whom he suspected Angela was having an affair. He then slashed the throats of his three young daughters - four-year-old Sophia, three-year-old Carmina, and twenty-two-month-old Teresa - leaving them for dead in the county dump. A little more than a day later, the bodies of his daughters were discovered. Miraculously, tiny Carmina was still alive and able to tell her rescuers, "My daddy cut me."
In Not Lost Forever, Carmina Salcido explores the events surrounding these headline-making murders with extraordinary clarity and composure. Reaching back to understand the events that traumatized her in childhood - and weaving them together with the recollections of detectives and witnesses - she reconstructs the story of her father's crimes, and their aftermath, in sobering detail.
Yet Carmina's story doesn't end there. Those who remember her as the tiny victim of these murders will also be shocked by what followed: how she was adopted by a Catholic extremist family who tried to change her name and bury her past; how she tried to escape their sheltering influence by joining a Carmelite convent and then a ranch for troubled girls; and how the psychological trials she endured along the way nearly broke her spirit - until, at last, she found peace by turning to the one relative still alive to share her grief: her grandfather.
As a young woman, Carmina returned to California to share her experiences and discover the family that was brutally taken from her. The devout Catholic also returned to look into her father's eyes on death row and confront the man who took away her entire family. With clear-eyed candor, courage, and grace, this brave young woman takes readers along on her miraculous journey of survival, discovery, and hope.


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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

No words can describe this tragedy.

What made the experience of listening to Not Lost Forever: My Story of Survival the most enjoyable?

"Enjoyable" is not a word I would use to describe this story. However, it was so riveting I couldn't stop listening.

What was the most compelling aspect of this narrative?

I am not normally interested in stories of murder. But having been a California resident when it happened, I was drawn to it. I hadn't heard all the details until now. I was so involved in the story that I got on line to watch old footage of TV News shows about it so that I could put faces to the names.

Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Xe Sands?

Anyone but this woman. I'm sorry to say but I struggled to get through her voice and the way she speaks. Her voice sounds like it would be better suited to a Harlequin Romance Novel. When she speaks as if she is Ramon Salcido, I literally yelled out loud for her to STOP! it was the worst audiobook narration I've come across to date

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

Disgust at Ramon, sadness for the family and Carmina's Grampa, admiration for Carmina. At three years old to do what she describes - and as an adult to continue on after what she's been through....God bless her!

Any additional comments?

This book should come with a warning - this true story is heartbreaking.

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- kris

Amazing story!

What did you love best about Not Lost Forever: My Story of Survival?

Although the story is a really sad one, this is a story about never giving up also.

What did you like best about this story?

I like the way the story ended. I don't want to ruin it though.

Any additional comments?

This is a sad true crime story so it's hard to pick out characters I liked, or things I loved about the story. The narrorator is really good, the story is amazing, her strength is awesome. If you like true crime it's definitely worth listening to!

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- Krcbdavis "I love audible, because honestly I don't have the time or the attention span to sit and read! I love true crime, and romantic comedies most"

Book Details

  • Release Date: 06-07-2012
  • Publisher: HarperCollins