Angels, Vampires and Douche Bags

  • by Carla Collins
  • Narrated by Carla Collins
  • 3 hrs and 11 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook

Publisher's Summary

In this candid confessional, comedian Carla Collins divides the world into the angels who guide us, inspire us, and save our butts; the sexy and trendy vampires who suck the life out of us; and the douche bags who constantly annoy, disgust, and taunt us.
With a fast wit, fake breasts and real heart, Collins shares her unconventional journey from a small steel town in Ontario, Canada, to Tinseltown, L.A. On this wild and revealing romp, she navigates her way through 72 imaginary friends, multiple fiancés, eight dogs, two marriages, and one topless grandmother.
Her hard-earned life lessons will show you that by taking risks, embracing humiliation and tapping into the power of laughter, anything is possible—and everyone is manageable. Attract more angels into your life, control your vampires, and keep all the douche bags at bay. Angels, Vampires and Douche Bags is original, edgy, uplifting and laugh-out-loud funny.

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful

Fantastic Portrayal Of Folks We Encounter

Carla’s depiction of various characters we come upon in life is down to earth. I too, believe Angels are "REAL PEOPLE" who touch our lives in an angelic way. Vampires are real people as well. Who has not encountered someone who’s sole purpose in life is a soul sucker. And Douche Bags? Nothing more needs to be said than the name.

I listened to this audio while driving on a long road trip. Very entertaining!
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- JulietteZ "JVZ"

Great Fun!

What I LOVED: I had (still don't) who Carla Collins is but she is freaking hilarious! This was a book about life and with her witty spin, I was laughing out loud while listening to it. She narrated her own book and you could tell she was making herself giggle at times.

What I LIKED: She talked about real things and gave real examples under each of the categories she talked about. She reads at a really good speed--I know this seems like something odd to mention but really the spe...more What I LOVED: I had (still don't) who Carla Collins is but she is freaking hilarious! This was a book about life and with her witty spin, I was laughing out loud while listening to it. She narrated her own book and you could tell she was making herself giggle at times.

What I LIKED: She talked about real things and gave real examples under each of the categories she talked about. She reads at a really good speed--I know this seems like something odd to mention but really the speed worked really well for the book. I also like that she blames Speidi for all the worlds problems :) (Totally Agree LOL)

Complaints: To short but hey that is just because I was completely entertained.

Why I gave it a 4: I laughed so much I was almost crying at parts. Carla is funny, down to earth, and really knows how to deliver a story. A not to miss autobiography in my book.

Who I would recommend it too: Fans of Chelsea Handler or Jen Lancaster should enjoy this one :)

Received from: bought from audible
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- Felicia

Book Details

  • Release Date: 06-15-2010
  • Publisher: Gildan Media, LLC